Parents reveal how they told adult children to move out or stopped paying for them, as its revealed 20% of men and 12% of women aged 25-34 still live at home

  • Parents support their children financially for much longer than previous generations
  • More than half of parents continue to provide financial support to their grown children until age 40, according to a USA Today study
  • Experts recommend phrasing conversations about achieving financial independence rather than ‘cutting off’

Parents fed up with supporting their offspring well into adulthood have revealed how they eventually got them to move out or start paying their own way.

The current economic climate means that many children are financially supported for much longer than previous generations.

One recent study from USA Today found that more than half of parents continue to provide financial support to their grown children up to the age of 40 – giving away an average of $718 per month.

Meanwhile, a Bankrate survey found nearly 70 percent of parents said they are currently making a sacrifice to help their child financially.

But for Nancy Clark, once her son Reid hit 28, it was time to consider cutting the cord.

When he was 28, Nancy Clark and her son Reid came to an agreement that he should move out within the year

When he was 28, Nancy Clark and her son Reid came to an agreement that he should move out within the year

Ashley Kaufman (center) was told by her parents that she could stay with them until she saved a $100,000 down payment on a house

Ashley Kaufman (center) was told by her parents that she could stay with them until she saved a $100,000 down payment on a house

“I know that becoming financially independent must feel a little painful,” she told the Wall Street Journal.

The two had previously discussed moving out, but it was over dinner in June 2022 that she gave him a one-year deadline to find a new place.

They set a date and Reid quit his job at his family’s New Hampshire ice cream shops to move to St. Paul. Minnesota where he works as a hockey team mascot along with a role at the M&M store.

At first, his mother bought groceries when he first moved out, and he still drops him the odd $50, but Reid stopped relying on her.

“I want to carve out my own path in life,” he told the WSJ.

About 20 percent of men and 12 percent of women between the ages of 25 and 34 lived at home last year, according to Census Bureau data.

Such was the case with the Kaufman family’s daughter Ashley, who was told she would have to leave their Manhattan apartment once she saved $100,000 for a down payment on a house.

She reached the goal at 25, but was still nervous about leaving, worried she would miss out on time with her siblings and the family pets. Her parents encouraged her to find her own place anyway.

About 65 percent of parents still provide their children with money, according to a USA Today survey of parents with offspring between the ages of 22 and 40.

About 65 percent of parents still provide their children with money, according to a USA Today survey of parents with offspring between the ages of 22 and 40.

One recent USA Today study found that more than half of parents continue to provide financial support to their grown children up to the age of 40

One recent USA Today study found that more than half of parents continue to provide financial support to their grown children up to the age of 40

And just two short years later, she is happily ensconced in her own apartment.

“I’m glad my parents gave me a little push,” she said.

The pandemic has exacerbated many of the challenges young people face as they try to strike out on their own.

Moreover, the rising cost of food and rent these days means that many remain trapped in their family home.

But Pam Lucina, 52, remembers facing similar problems when her parents first cut the purse strings.

She graduated with $40,000 in student debt after choosing an expensive grad school she assumed her parents would foot the bill for.

The decision meant she couldn’t contribute to her 401(k) for five years and informed her decision to become a financial advisor.

“I know that my parents sacrificed to give me what they did and I’m grateful for all their support in the past, but I wish I had been more prepared,” she told the WSJ.

Bank of America Private Bank Wealth Strategy Advisor Rocky Fittizzi told the outlet that a “gradual approach” may work best.

‘Getting the conversation around financial independence gives it a positive spin. Telling your kids you’re cutting them off suggests it’s a punishment,’ he said.

AMOUNT PARENTS CONTRIBUTE TO ADULT CHILDREN IN EACH STATE
State Average dollars per month provided
California 869.5
Washington 853.0
Virginia 841,2
New York 761.1
Ohio 759.2
Massachusetts 705.1
Illinois 697.4
South Carolina 683.4
Texas 671.2
Utah 667.0
Maryland 665.7
Nevada 665.3
New Mexico 663.1
Kansas 660.4
Colorado 642.6
Georgia 640.6
Florida 614.5
Minnesota 597.8
New Jersey 583.3
Connecticut 570.5
Louisiana 552.6
Tennessee 547.9
Pennsylvania 517.1
Alabama 516.6
Indiana 515.1
Arizona 512.4
Oregon 512.0
North Carolina 451.2
Mississippi 449.9
Kentucky 428.8
Missouri 421.5
Wisconsin 412.2
Michigan 401.3
Arkansas 395.5
Oklahoma 384.8
Iowa 349.0